Banana

When I was a kid, my brothers used to call me ABC...American born Chinese....so even though my Cantonese is better than theirs, and even though, I have always shown more interest in Chinese culture than they ever did, I was never viewed as Chinese enough.  In fact, to my brothers, and many other Chinese people I've met,  I've been told I speak Chinese funny, and I act too white.

However, what I experience in my daily life is that I cannot hide my Chinese culture.  I may speak English clearly, and "act white", but even behind sunglasses....I am Chinese.  You look at me and you see the yellow skin tone and almond eyes.  How many times have I been asked to translate?  Or say something Chinese?  Do people not understand how degrading that can feel?

I'm still caught somewhere in the middle.